Cynthia Appletree
As the old lady put the kettle on, Len made himself comfortable at the kitchen table. “What a lovely kitchen you have Mrs..?” “Appletree. Cynthia …
Jimmy the Gopher
f you’ve ever had chance to chat to a sheep – then they’ve likely told you about the problems they’ve endured trying to fill out …
In the Bookies with Phil the Whippet
Seems you owe me a bit of money, Len my friend” Jimmy the Gopher said sinisterly, chewing a toothpick dangling from the corner of his …
Credit Trouble
Len and Bert stood outside the bookmakers counting their change. “How much do you have?” Len asked. “60p” Bert replied. “How much do you have …
Spaghetti Hoops
Back and Len and Bert’s house at number 23 Cherry Bakewell Avenue, Len was sat at the kitchen table reading the newspaper. Bert was putting …
Mr Sebastian-Munchy is not available
It was about 10 past 10 (give or take 10 minutes) when Len and Burt casually walked into to the East Finchley Hilton, both dressed …
Introducing Len
Len the sheep, aged 39, took his clipboard out of the van, fastened his clip-on tie onto a scruff of wool on his neck and abled up the pathway to number 3 Cobbletree lane.
“Ding ding!” Went the doorbell, in the way doorbells often do.
“Winning mentality… Winning mentality..” Len said softly to himself as the door was answered by an old be-speccled dear wearing an apron and drying her eyes with a dishcloth.
“Good afternoon mam!” Len began, “let me introuc…”
“I’m not interested in anything you have to sell!!” The old lady snapped as she began to close the door again.
“Wait!” Len said, putting one hoof in the door jam, “I’m not selling anything at all…”
The old lazy looked at him suspiciously over the rim of her spectacles.
“You’re not?”
“No no… In fact I’m here to give you money!!” Len took out a 20 pound note from inside his wool, and waggled it about in front of the old ladies nose.
“…give me money? What’s the catch?” Her eyes narrowing even more to the point where Len was surprised she could even see out of them.
“No catch. A free £20 note. All yours. Just take it and I’ll be in my way!”
The lady opened the door wider and outstretched her hand.
“… Of course I wouldn’t say no to a cup of tea whilst I’m here!”
“Oh! Well, I suppose that’s the least I could do in…”
“Thank you madam!” Len said, stepping into old ladies house….
ABOUT LEN THE SHEEP
Len the sheep is a middle-aged bachelor who shares a house at 23 Bakewell Avenue with his best friend, Bert the Puma. He struggles to hold down a variety of jobs, and can often be seen in the bookmakers, or in his local pub wearing a flat-cap, drinking John Smiths and smoking Benson & Hedges.
No sheep or puma associated with these posts received payment or anything of value, or entered into any agreement, in connection with the depiction of tobacco products.
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